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I am planning to get married in few months time after searching for a wife for over two years.
I made it clear to my exgirlfriend before we started dating that I won't marry her even if we date each other. But while we were dating, she got pregnant for me and we decided to abort the baby though I regreted it, for if I have asked her to keep the pregnancy I would have become a father by now. I pray the Lord forgives me.
She went through so much pain during and after the abortion, I felt very sorry for her.
Before she got pregnant, I had left Lagos to the north for military service. While on duty in the north she called me on phone crying that she was missing me that she wants to visit me where I was stationed. I told her not to come due to some reasons but she cried to me on phone and so I was forced to invite her over. That was when she got pregnant, returned to Lagos and then had the abortion of the baby.
My family members do not want me to marry her due to some reasons - education, height, village distance though we speak the same language.
Meanwhile, even before the abortion, I had a prophecy from my friend telling me to be careful with women and that there are some dangers ahead for me from women. My friend gave a prophecy saying that he saw me catch gonorrhea in a dream. He questioned if I use condoms during sex but I wasn't giving a direct answer so he counselled me to get married as soon as possible because of the dangers ahead.
Again I was posted to another state in the North to fight against terrorists. I met many northerners there, very friendly and wanted me to marry them but I would not because they did not meet my criteria for marriage.
Now I'm back in Lagos and I returned with a lady from my own state, my own dialect I would love to marry, she meets my criteria.
But my family members say she's too old for me, I am 33 while she says she's 29. My aunt says she will put me in the armpit, could mean she will take me for granted. In yoruba, oma gbemi mora . If u know what that means.
Now she lives with me in my apartment. My mother says I have to complete my late father's house before marriage, my elder brother warns that there's something he sees about the lady that I don't see and he doesn't see something good.
One of my other brothers says I should wait until 5 years time. It appears that my family aren't happy about our coming together.
Another reason I should be afraid is because my new girl, the first time I approached her for marriage she says that God did not ordain both of us to marry because as at then she was about to get married to one custom officer but the marriage did not hold again.
Reason was because the custom officer wants her to get pregnant first. But I guess she refused to sleep with him as she claims that's why it didn't work out between them. The custom officer is financially okay than me or richer than me when it comes to money.
She later turned back to me few months later, to now say that she sought the face of God concerning us both, and that God now says I am the one for her. My aunt claims that the lady is lying to me that she does not love me.
Meanwhile, my ex girlfriend is raining curses on me and promises to deal with me. I also blamed myself because I said hurting words to her on the phone.
She says that I have the guts to bring another woman with me to Lagos, and I didn't tell her I was in Lagos. She says she will go naked and swear with the blood of the child that was aborted.
I am in confusion, what should I do?
Sometimes I feel that there's no reason for me to panic. But should there be a reason to panic because I have wronged my ex girlfriend, did I wrong her ?
Can I ever be loved by this woman I am yet to marry, does she really love me? As I do for her?
Please what do I need to do?
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